The Issues of Internet friendship

                                      My Facebook Friend Wheel.


The above illustration is not some recently discovered volcanic planet as viewed by Hubble somewhere in outer space. It is much closer to me.  You could say it is close to my heart.

Friendwheel is a neat Facebook application that lets you see how your friends connect, not just with you, but with each other.  I have almost 400 friends and I am pretty certain not one of them connects just with me.

This is a social network. I have been building it for a good number of years and it is comprised almost completely of people I trust, or who are trusted by people I know in real life. The exceptions are people I've chatted with on Facebook who have persuaded me that I would trust them if I knew them better.

There are people at Facebook who want to be among the most popular. A good friend of mine has nearly 5000 friends.  If you look at his Friends Wheel, you will discover that the center f it is all white space. In short, people tend to just connect with him and not with each other.

Both approaches have merit.  There is power and influence in popularity and anyone who claims to have 5000 friends is certainly popular.  Hell, maybe my friend could run for public office.

But that's not I want.  i want a network, where all the people can help each other.  I believe in the power of the network and that for it to really be a network, the nodes need to interconnect. We are the nodes of social networking. 

I am amazed at the power of this network.  it is more useful to me than my Outlook Contacts list.  There are people who found me on Facebook who knew me in elementary school and from every other phase I've been through since.

I have never laid eyes on many of them, but that does not mean I connect.  It means that I will meet each of them when I can, and it will be like meeting old friends for the first time.  In the last few weeks, I have had conversations that started on Facebook that have led to new business relationships, once by playing online Scrabble. Facebook friends have helped me found people for the SAP Global Survey that I would never have found otherwise.

I think some people get one important part of this confused.  The virtual part is the space where we meet people online. The real part is the people we meet.

I believe that other than the tangible part, online friendship s absolutely identical to the terrestrial kind. The difference is the Internet lets you build a larger,stronger and more valuable network faster.

In both cases, friendship seems to me to be like an old fashioned bank account.  You have to put something into them, and when you do, you get back more than you invested.












 

Comments

[Josh Morgan]

Shel,

Very cool app. Trying it now.

[Curt]

Very good realization, Shel. I found the same thing with mine. I couldn't believe how many people I knew knew each other. Many times without my having known it before The Wheel Revealed It.

[kenekaplan]

This is sweet personally and timely professionally! At Intel where I work, we've been talking about next steps, or leaps we'd like to take to communicate and connect better with our friends, fans, detractors, investors, new people and...each other! Each of us is a touch point to learning and sharing. Visuals like this really help show what's already going on, and what's possible is more of us participate. Thank you!

[kenekaplan]

This is sweet personally and timely professionally! At Intel where I work, we've been talking about next steps, or leaps we'd like to take to communicate and connect better with our friends, fans, detractors, investors, new people and...each other! Each of us is a touch point to learning and sharing. Visuals like this really help show what's already going on, and what's possible is more of us participate. Thank you!

[kenekaplan]

This is sweet personally and timely professionally! At Intel where I work, we've been talking about next steps, or leaps we'd like to take to communicate and connect better with our friends, fans, detractors, investors, new people and...each other! Each of us is a touch point to learning and sharing. Visuals like this really help show what's already going on, and what's possible is more of us participate. Thank you!

[Jim]

Very cool app! I'm going to give it a try, though my paltry 40 Facebook friends won't provide as colorful or as interesting a result, I'm sure.

You might also like ConnectionCloud , which ignores you (gee, thanks! ;) and focuses instead on mapping the connections among your friends. It seems to tend to reveal communities within your friends, as well as where communities overlap.

[francine hardaway]

I agree with you Shel. My network is my network. I tried Connection Cloud, and was amazed at how close my connections were to one another. That's a good thing.

I should stop now. You have said what I would have said.

[Ricky]

Internet friendship is the best way where you can increase market your products easily. For more information just log on to....
Internet Marketing

[David_M]

I agree very much. I belong to a number of on line networking groups, including Ecademy and Friends Reunited. These connections, with friends I know very well or hardly at all, are getting stronger through the power of the Internet. Someone asked me the other day whether I believe that the Internet and e-mail have killed friendship and conversation. My answer is NO NO NO! On the contrary, it is a super way of keeping in touch and making new contacts, and also provides a lot of things to talk about.

David Marks
London, UK

[Joanie]

I actually think that even with only 50 friends on FB,keeping touch with all of them is a complexed mission.
This app you're talking about sure sounds interesting, but I don't see the use in it apart from satisfying the curiosity. I'm using an awesome desktop tool called 8hands which it allows me to keep track on my online relationships. Using this software provides all I need to handle any number of friends.

[Sheryl Breuker]

I have a similar friendship wheel, though in truth a MUCH smaller version.
I find it fascinating the way we have all developed a need to expose ourselves. Is it the amount of time spent online? Is it the need to have connections that more closely resemble traditional relationships? I wonder.

I must tell you, I was speaking to one of my very good friends the other day, someone I met online, but who has ported over to my 'real' life friend list, about this very thing. I absolutely agree with you with regard to the bank account analogy. I used it on him. It really is like that, but the rewards are far greater than the interest accrued. Friendship rewards last a lifetime.

Having said that...I do think not all people get it. Not all people trust, and not all of us come across as interesting. To be honest, we aren't all going to have 5000 friends. In fact, we aren't all going to have even 100. Some of us are not that interested in penny stocks. We'd rather have security, investing more safely with specific dividends in mind.

Take care, Shel.

[Sarmila]

i would like to make new friendship by online chat.

[Sarmila]

i would like make friendship by internet. if you want please mail me. i am administration of the project. must o fthe time i am in the interent.

[Sarmila]

i would like make friendship by internet. if you want please mail me. i am administration of the project. must o fthe time i am in the interent.