The Dangers of Saying Bad Things About Dell

You may recall that a while back I reported that I had lost the "I" key on my Dell Inspiron 600 m keyboard and needed to press several times on the squishy rubber thigamabob (you geeks know what that means) that was located where my "I" used to be.

I've been waiting for my new ThinkPad, which I thought would have been here a week ago, but there were some UPS snags. It is now scheduled to arrive tomorrow afternoon. 

But that's not why I write.  Instead, I wish to share with you the continuing saga of a computer as it slowly disintegrates. Mind you, that until I wrote the reasons why I would never buy another Dell a couple months back, --my Inspiron 600m worked just fine.

Since then, I've come to believe in the existence of mean-spirited Dell demons working in concert against me.  Here are a few of the lowlights of what has happened in the last four weeks with my Dell:

• The battery had worked fine. Just fine. Two days after my "I " fell off, it died. It went from holding a charge from 3.5-4 hours down to just 20-minutes.
• I have a USB Hub on my desktop, with four peripherals plugged in.  When I plug the Hub into the Dell, I hear four ding-ding sounds for the peripherals as I should. But then the ding-dings continue randomly.  Sometimes it sounds like a Salvation Army Santa Claus is ringing a bell inside my Dell.
• The bottom plate that covers my DRAM SIMMs fell off the computer.  I thought it would just require a tiny screw driver to fix.  But no, it turns out that the screw holes in the form had stripped out. The problem is in the form itself, not in the screws themselves.
• Today, I went to print a check in my Quicken and I could not get my menus to stay open so that I could click on "Print." I know this sounds like a software problem, but but somehow, I suspect Dell is behind this as well.
• If you squeeze on the Dell palm plate to the left of the Touchpad, there's an audible squeak. If you squeeze to the right there a slight click. Neither gives sound enhances my confidence.
• A close inspection of the surviving keys on my pad reveal that the paint on the left "Shift" key, as well as the "A" "S" & "D" have pretty much worn off. I should not complain. At least these keys remain connected to the keyboard.
• The rubber doo-hickey that keeps the power cord wrapped around the voltage brick, when traveling broke off, but now I'm just being overly picky.

In case you are wondering how I am writing this now, I went out a few days ago and bought myself and external Dynex USB keyboard at Best Buy for $29.  It works quite well.  I would have schlepped it to the Syndicate Conference where I was dying to live blog, but the keyboard sounds louder than my old Underwood 018 manual typewriter that I bought in a pawnshop when I was 14 and still keep in my garage. Also, it's impossible to use a full sized keyboard with a notebook on my lap, at least it has been since I lost some weight. There were tables at the conference, but I needed to stay near power sockets, because the **&%^$$ battery only had 20 minutes of life in it.

I've missed blogging at two conferences in two weeks. Ive been sending emails to people from these conferences using an "8" whenever I needed an "I," as someone had suggested this. then do a universal replace.  That worked for a while, but then the rubber doo-hickey dried up and I could not squeeze anymore I's out for a universal replace. You can't just paste an I in on Word Search and Replace, or so I have learned. I was typing 8s to a bunch of people in a panel talk this afternoon, when one of the speakers mentioned how unprofessional typos appear. I thought: "Gr8!"

Summary: I really hope my ThinkPad comes in tomorrow. Goodbye Dell.  I promise not to write anything more bad about you.  You guys play really rough.

Comments

[Tim Jackson- Masiguy]

Shel,

I was nearly in tears as I read this. Not only because it was so funny, but because I have experienced the same sort of "cascading failure" situation in the past.

You're probably right though; the little Dell Gremlins got pissed and decided to get you back.

[Kami Huyse]

I was starting to wonder where the new computer was since you hadn't blogged about it. :-)

[shel israel]

The new keyboard, with anatomicly correct vowels has arrived and I am using it as I type right now. By Monday it will have all my stuff in it, and I will start blogging with a vengeance.

[Jim Courtney]

Well, Shel, first when I bought my Dell Inspiron 8500 I found a good deal on a (wireless) Logitech Keyboard and Mouse at the local Costco. As a result my actual laptop keyboard is only used when I leave the office.

But really, Shel, you are typing too many "i's"; on my (Logitech) keyboard the only key that has worn away in 30 months usage is the "e", probably because, as a Canadian, I may have a tendency to put in the odd "eh?". Does the fact you have worn out the "I" initially reflect on some sort of egotistical bent? Oh, and my laptop keyboard looks prisitine (at least exposure to air does not affect it)!

Your battery experience is typical of all my Dell's. They work fine but some day the battery staying power just drops off the edge. As partial relief to this problem, I was happy to find laptop plugs on an almost new Air Canada Airbus 320 last night. However, to make them available they put something under the middle "E" and "B" seats; something large enough (like an oversized power supply) that tall people such as myself cannot get our feet properly under the seat (especially with Air Canada's 32 inch seat pitch standard). Fortunately a few people did not show up for a flight that had been sold out for over two weeks (I only had one seat to choose from at that time) and the onboard staff worked to find me more comfortable seating.

I did double the memory in this unit during my travels last week and found that memory cover of which you speak. Suspicious of small screws that can strip the threads of their holes, I am now glad I looked for the specific number 1 jeweler's screwdriver recommended in the (online) manual after reading of your experience. (Fortunatley my host had one in his toolkit.)

So life is just not getting easier, especially for laptop using Road Warriors....

(Now if all these blogging services would include a spell checker -- Blogger does ... I think the word you wanted above is "anatomically". And was it just a new keyboard that IBM delivered or the whole PC? Otherwise what is the "stuff" you are going to put in your keyboard by Monday?)

Having said both good and bad things about my Dell, I will now have to keep an eye out for the Dell Gremlins accessory about which you wrote.

We look forward to your more intense blogging. Keep up the good work...

[shel israel]

Jim,
Down here in California, we put i before e, If they did that in Texas the company I have just abandoned would be Dill.

[meryl]

(regaining composure from laughing hard)

Sure hope Dell is following your book's advice and is listening to these conversations...

[Matt Norrie]

You didn't need to buy a new keyboard you could have gone to www.laptopkeys.co.uk and bought one individual key.

[Chester]

DO NOT buy anything from www.laptopkeys.co.uk. They charged me 9.00 for just one little plastic key and IT NEVER CAME. I got an email confirming my purchase, but it never came. A whole year has gone by since I placed my order, I've sent complaints and they are swiftly ignored. I repeat DO NOT buy anything from www.laptopkeys.co.uk.

[refurbished computers]

how come such a Big company did not take any notice of your lose?